Breckenridge, CO

I know what you guys are thinking… “What happened to them?! They haven’t posted in what seems like months… Nay! Years!”

Well, fear not! I am here to update you on our adventures. Despite what our map has said for months, we are no longer in Boulder, CO. We had a great time in Boulder, and we will probably document those adventures at some point, but today is about Breckenridge (and other resorts)!

We’re working a modified schedule. We’re waking up around 6:30 AM and working ’til 1:00 PM. At 1:00 PM we drive to Breckenridge Ski Resort and ride until close of lifts at 4:00 PM. It’s a tough life. There’s too much visibility, and the snowboarders keep messing everything up!

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Found a yeti in the woods!

In addition, I’ve developed an unhealthy obsession with the weather and ski conditions:

Weather Underground AppOn the Snow App

How many vertical feet and days on mountain I’ve gotten:

Epic Mix App

and just trying to git gud! I’ve been hugging a lot of trees (aka crashing) (because I’m not good), but on the plus side, my gloves smell delightfully of pine tar.

One day we went to Beaver Creek, and they have cookies, daily, at 3:00 PM!

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Story time! We were at Keystone Resort yesterday, and boy was it crowded! We saw more then a couple of crashes and a couple of folks getting slid down the mountain by ski patrol, which is always a sobering sight. Sometimes you forget that skiing is an extreme sport, and injuries are common. At one point we saw a medical evac helicopter – not a good sign anywhere.

We spent hours trying to catch up with our friend Shaun, to no avail, but in our shuffling, he was positioned at Labonte’s Smokhouse BBQ at the bottom of Santiago and Ruby Express lifts. He described the scene. One skier came down the mountain, clipped another skier and went “helicoptering into the trees.” A heroic effort by ski patrol. The helicopter we’d seen fly over evacuated the unfortunate soul.

Be careful out there.

On a lighter note, I developed an acute condition known as “forgetting how to get off a chair lift.” So (stupid snowboarders), we were on a 4 chair with two other snowboarders, and uh, yeah, one was goofy, which means we were all screwed from the onset. Mo was trying to accommodate for that awkwardness, and her and our snowboards got tangled, so the goofy boarder and her buddy got off the lift without issue, of course. Mo and I, eternally bound,  rode it around past the ramp into that freakish nether where the lift operator has to make a decision, and everyone looks at you like your an idiot. WELL THEY WEREN’T WRONG!

But wait! We weren’t quite to the point of no return. Mo kind of jumped, and I kind of lowered her, and together we got her out of harm’s way. She was front row for the most beautifully awkward – I don’t know, maybe I’ll do a swan dive? – freeze up in ski chair dismount history. As I’m doing the calculations of how I might splay out, lay down under the chair as it passes, roll and maybe not get drug to my cheese grater’d hell on the rocks below the lift, I see that, just for fools like me, the embankment flanking the exit ramp is nice and groomed, I need only to stand up, dismount and jump a 2 foot cornice to safety. Except I’m not agile or capable enough to make any of that look good. Nonetheless, this was the only option, and I began the perilously idiotic attempt. To what I will describe as a great success, I might add, until I flopped over the cornice and kind of flailed to the gravity-assisted splat that must have accompanied my embarrassment. As I stood and turned to the raucous core of folks applauding my foolishness, I realized nobody cared. And I went on with my day. To fall on my face, naturally, as I exited the next lift.

Like a total newb, I got up, brushed the snow off, and took solace in the fact the neither time did the operator stop the lift. So at least I wasn’t that guy.

Cheers everybody.

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